Mistakes

Ah, the essence of youth. That mindset that the world is still open to you, and mistakes can't completely alter the path you desire your life to follow. It's a heady elixir I must say, thinking that I can forget all my past mistakes, still make disasterously large new ones and still be the person I want to be. I guess that's the most damaging aspect to making mistakes, especially in our youth. We're expected to make them, but no one ever tells you how different they make you. No one sits you down to explain that after you make this decision which ends up being a mistake, how the person you were vanishes and this new one appears, and you start to question your life, your mind, your style, your hair.Literally everything comes into question. It irrevocably changes you, sometimes on the outside, but mostly on the inside.
I know many will glorify mistakes - you tried! you failed! but at least you have the experience! - which is great. You have the experience. You have a experience, which probably falls in line with a long list of experiences. Because life is all about the experiences we have, isn't it? So, where do mistakes fall on this list? Are they good? Bad? Maybe ambivilent? Can we really say? I think the only definite anwer is that our mistakes change us. They push along new paths in life, sometimes they leave us with bruises, sometimes they leave us a little wiser. But that's the trouble with youth, is we walk into these mistakes, feeling invicible, and then these mistakes crack us. They change us, and we don't know how to cope.
Especially now, the years of our twenties are slippery, we need to find ourselves in a world we are little prepared for, and mistakes chip away at our armor. We crave success and beauty and power and wisdom, but on the inside, we are fragile and nervous. And boast about our lack of fear, "what can a mistake do?" well for one, a financial mistake can make you homeless, which really screws up your life. Maybe an emotional mistake leaves you feeling vulnerable, makes you cringe and cry on the inside. Those are the worst, I think. When you wish you knew you were making the biggest mistake of your life, but didn't. These are the times that hurt the most. They make you question who you are, your identity. They alter the way you see the world, the way you see people.
This is a harsher way to view mistakes, but let's be honest, not all mistakes are life altering. But I think its important to realize that our mistakes shape us, they mold us, and they change us. They are more than just obstacles or events to fix. Sometimes, mistakes are the books that give us wisdom, sometimes they are the broken bones that make us stronger, and sometimes they are the missing road signs that send us in a completely new direction.